I believe the greatest musical works come from the hands of those with bleak, dark, and tragic destinies. Look at Beethoven—pain, loneliness, and darkness became his tools, weapons used to unleash his rage through music. The howling of the storm, the throat-tearing roars—these are realms children from privileged families can never touch. Having enjoyed comfort all their lives, they will never risk their very survival to forge great music. Even with every advantage—professional training, grand pianos worth hundreds of thousands—they do not cherish what they have; they choose a life of easy pleasures instead. If the heavens intend for someone to create a masterpiece, they must first subject them to suffering and poverty.
Just like me. Destitute and broken my entire life. Twenty-nine years old, never having dated, never having experienced love, bound to a life of absolute isolation. Yet, I thank the heavens for granting me poverty, because only through it have I learned to cherish the chance to make music. I thank them for the darkness. I have tried to end my life multiple times, drowning in an unfathomable sorrow. I never received professional musical training. I never studied music theory. I cannot play any instruments, nor could I ever afford them. But I crawled my way through FL Studio, figuring it out piece by piece. For five years, I poured myself into composing classical music. In the beginning, my tracks couldn't even keep a proper rhythm; today, my classical pieces have earned over twenty thousand likes on music platforms.
A high school dropout, battered and bruised by society. The only beautiful thing in my life was my dog, Diandian. Until the day he was ruthlessly murdered.
When he died, my world died with him. My kindness, my innocence, my purity—all utterly trampled, violated, and shattered. I was cheated, exploited, oppressed, and poisoned by this world. So I began to write songs to unleash my fury. Every classical piece I wrote for Diandian was cloaked in darkness, grief, and agony. I wrote hundreds of them. I used to bitterly question why others didn't have to suffer from schizophrenia while I did. Why everyone else could get married while I had no girlfriend. Why my precious Diandian had to be mercilessly killed.
But finally, I woke up. I don’t have schizophrenia at all! I am just consumed by an overwhelming sorrow! And I don’t need a girlfriend! What I need is a truly great piece of music! The meaning of a genuinely beautiful piece of music far outweighs my own existence. I do not care for wealth or fame. I only want to create a truly beautiful piece of music—one that will never be buried by the passage of time, one that will never become obsolete as the world moves forward. Music is the ultimate universal language, the only one capable of tearing down the barriers of human communication. A truly beautiful melody can evoke the deepest, most visceral resonance within the human soul. Long after Mozart and Beethoven died, their names and their melodies remain immortalized. Tens of thousands of years from now, people will still listen to their art, because they crafted the most beautiful music in human history.
I possess a desperate, burning hunger to compose a truly beautiful piece of music—a masterpiece that will withstand the test of time. I will never give up until that melody is born, or until my last breath is drawn. The weight of that music is greater than my own life. It matters not if my days are stripped of money and renown, as long as I can finally bring that one magnificent piece of music into existence.
My Diandian was brutally murdered! That is the unalterable truth! Then let this grief be pushed to its absolute limits. Let the pain strike with even greater, more violent force. Let the darkness consume my soul and utterly annihilate every beautiful thing I ever loved. Diandian’s death is the lifelong engine that drives my creation. For Diandian, no matter how bitter or exhausting it gets, I will endure and press on. I have no more time to waste. Even if my existence is entirely solitary, I will never envy anyone again. Because I already possess everything I ever wanted.
When I first started, my music was primitive, crude, and unpolished. The only pillar holding it up was my ability to write beautiful melodies. I believed that a haunting melody stands above all else—the melody is the very soul of music. Today, AI can take a crude, rough sketch and transform it into a fully realized composition. When I heard what AI did with my melody, I wept through the entire night. I was right all along. The melody is the soul. My songs weren't bad; they simply lacked a professional framework and the high-fidelity timbres of a live symphony orchestra. The orchestral tools I used in FL Studio before were too rigid, static, and flat. But when the AI breathed life into my melody, completing the orchestration, I was shattered by its transcendent beauty. Those notes felt as though they were cascading straight out of heaven, piercing through my entire soul.
I am completely awakened now. I thank the heavens for the agony, for the darkness, for the grief, and for the isolation. They have allowed me to forge these heavy burdens into an indomitable power!
I am in absolute agony! But this is a blessing. This pain forces me to roar with furious rage through classical music, tearing through every beautiful façade.
I am in absolute grief! But this is the righteous attribute of humanity. This sorrow has gifted me melodies drenched in raw emotion. Every single note, is the agonizing, heart-wrenching wail of living a death-in-life after losing Diandian. Every tear I shed when I hear how heartbreaking my melodies are becomes a note played by the orchestra.
I am in absolute darkness! But this is my fuel. The end of darkness signifies death. I must complete a monumental work before the shadows entirely swallow my soul. My time is running out. I didn't start making music until I was twenty-five. I am so far behind. I will cherish every single second to write that one melody—a melody beautiful enough to move God Himself, a truly magnificent piece of music.
I am absolutely Solitude! But this gives me more time. No girlfriend, no romance. I am always by myself in my room when I compose. A lifetime of eternal loneliness means I can commit my mind and body entirely to creation, completely shielded from the noise of the outside world.
Death creeps closer with every passing day. Time is my sole enemy. There are only two possible outcomes: either I give birth to that truly beautiful piece of music, or my breath stops forever.
I will never give up! I will never surrender! No force on earth will stop me from creating that beautiful music.
Only time is dragging me toward the edge of mortality, pulling me down into the abyss toward hell with every passing minute, every passing second.
Yet, I thank the heavens! I count myself blessed that I was spared a life of empty indulgence. Because this absolute agony, this grief, this darkness, this loneliness, and this destruction have forged who I am today. They have given me a true soul, allowing me to write melodies and music of such staggering beauty.
I only hope that one day, I will finally create that truly beautiful piece of music.
Enough talk! I must seize every moment to write my music! I know Diandian is in heaven, watching my every move. He is looking down at me with a smile, so incredibly proud of me! Because Diandian knows that I must, I can, and I absolutely will create that one truly beautiful piece of music!
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